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If you don’t know my story by now, I’m a mom and entrepreneur (hence the blog name). While I don’t think you need to be either to be successful or learn about life, they have both taught me so much, so I thought I’d share what I’ve learned with you!
People always give advice (whether you like it or not)
If I earned a dollar for every piece of unsolicited advice I receive as a mom, I would be a millionaire by now. People love giving you their two cents on raising a child, even if they aren’t a parent themselves.
Doesn’t mean you have to take it
Unless I specifically ask for advice, I typically don’t listen to any advice given to me about my daughter. I do what’s best for my daughter and me. Don’t feel like you have to listen to what people tell you, even if they have good intentions. Doing what’s best for your kid comes first, whether people think it’s “wrong” or not. We aren’t robots, and we don’t have to do the exact same thing that everyone else does.
You’ll cry over your kid
I’ve never been much of an emotional person. Once I gave birth to my daughter, I cried about EVERYTHING. When she was being super happy and cute, I cried about it. When she got her first (and second) set of shots, I cried about it. I’ve even cried about how cute her long eyelashes are. Does there mean that something is wrong with me? Nope. It just means I’m a mom who loves her kid.
It’s okay to be the tough parent
My husband is the tough parent out of the two of us. Our daughter has him wrapped around her finger, but he’s also big on discipline. We aren’t trying to raise a spoiled brat, so whenever it’s time for time out or a stern talking to, he’s usually the one to do it. As much as we love our daughter, we are raising her to be a strong, independent, and hard-working young woman. You can’t do that without a little tough love sometimes.
It’s also okay to be a softie
Whenever my daughter falls or hurts herself, I typically run right to her and hold her while she cries. My husband thinks I’m a little dramatic sometimes, but I want her to know I will always help her when she falls. I have no problem admitting that I’m a hard ass with everything in life, except my daughter. She brings out my soft side, and I love her for it.
You’ll have to make hard choices
Even when I think I have everything planned out to a T, things go wrong. It’s hard to balance being a mom and entrepreneur. It’s hard being a mom period. You are always juggling so many hats, and it can get harder when you are given a choice between your business or family.
Don’t let people tell you how to run your business
I’ve had clients get upset that I can’t work past a certain time. People tell me I shouldn’t let my child interrupt what I’m doing when I’m working. I’ve even had people go so far as to say that because I’m a #mompreneur, they can’t take me seriously. But you know what? Screw them. I’m a mom and entrepreneur. But I’m a mom first. If I wanted to be just an entrepreneur, I wouldn’t have had my daughter. I run my business the way I want to. At the end of the day, I only have to answer to myself, which is one of the reasons why I love self-employment.
You aren’t superwoman
Even if you try your hardest, you’ll never be able to give your 100% to everyone and everything. You aren’t superwoman, and neither am I. We can only do so much for everyone, while also attempting to take care of ourselves. Keep that in mind the next time someone wants you to host yet another party or work on an extra project.
Consistency is key
Consistency is key. This doesn’t mean I’m always consistent, but I’ve learned that consistency makes for an easier life. To try and stay consistent, I’ve implemented a schedule and have a planner that I use on a regular basis.
Owning a business is worth it
I’ve made quite a few sacrifices for both my business and my family. I’ve turned down potential clients because I wanted to have family time. Sometimes I have to stop playing with my daughter so I can focus on writing or projects. It can be difficult to balance both being a mom and entrepreneur, but owning my own business is SO worth it. I can make my own hours, increase or decrease my work, and even have a business that can be passed down if my daughter wants to take it over in the future.
Not everyone is on the same path as you
Not everyone is going to understand why you have kids. People may look down on you if you didn’t finish college (don’t worry, I didn’t either). People may question the choices you make. However, you just have to remember that everyone has a different path to follow. People may question your choices, and you may question others. But, everyone is at a different stage, a different time, a different chapter in their life. And even if you are the same age, or went to the same school, doesn’t mean you are on the same journey.
Your happiness is important
I’m so tired of mothers being told that they should expect to be unhappy because “that’s what happens when you have kids”. Since when did me having kids mean I can’t be happy? If anything, it’s IMPORTANT for me to have a happy life. Too many moms suffer from postpartum depression, sadness, and loneliness. We can also feel isolated, misunderstood, and sometimes downright angry. It’s hard being a mom, don’t make it harder by putting everyone else’s happiness before your own. It’s okay to want and work towards to be happy, even if other people don’t think so.
Self-care is important too
You can’t serve from an empty cup. You can’t do anything great if you aren’t taking care of yourself. Nuff said.
There will never be complete balance (and that’s okay)
While I can achieve some sort of balance as a mom and entrepreneur, I know I will never be able to be 100% balanced in everything. Sometimes dinner will take the back burner and I’ll have to order takeout. Sometimes I’ll have to sacrifice a little sleep because so many things need to be done. That’s a-okay with me.
Watch your money
If I can just give you one piece of advice as a mom and entrepreneur, it would be to watch your dough. As the person who is the breadwinner of her family, I have to make sure that bills are paid and there is food on the table. I can’t provide for my family if I’m not watching my money carefully.
Save for a rainy day
I’m not saying you have to save $100,000 in a year or less, but I am saying that you should save for a rainy day. There have been many times where my family has had to dip into our emergency fund. Just a few months ago we had to take out $600 just to replace our car windows because someone broke in. Three years ago, that would have put my husband and me in a financial bind. But now, because of our emergency fund, we are able to handle those emergencies that come up.
Set your kid up for success
I will never make my daughter go into financial distress. A lot of my family is used to passing down generational debt, but I want to build generational wealth. Although I won’t just throw my daughter cash whenever she asks for it, I will teach her how to handle her finances responsibly, and I will support her financially until she’s old enough to handle everything on her own.
I don’t want her being 18 and working three different jobs just to make ends meet. I don’t want her to worry about student loans. And I sure as hell don’t want her growing up with a bad relationship with money. I want her to work hard, but I don’t want her to throw her life away for money because society tells her she should.
Kids don’t need as much as you think
I will never forget the ridiculous amount of items everyone told me I had to buy as a new parent. From a wipe warmer to a $500 stroller, I was told to buy everything. And in my three years of being a mom, I’ve realized that my kid really doesn’t need too much. We never had a changing table, my daughter didn’t have warm wipes, and we didn’t even own a super fancy bouncer. And you know what? My kid turned out just fine. Her doctor always marvels at how healthy, smart, and happy she is.
Now, I’m not saying you can’t buy what you want. But what I’m saying is that you shouldn’t buy things just because people say to. Kids really don’t need as much as people say they do. If that was the case, we wouldn’t be here, because many of these gadgets were only created in the last 50 years or so. So I say, buy what you can afford, and forget the rest. You’ll still be a kick-ass parent.
Well there you have it, 18 things I’ve learned while being a mom and entrepreneur. What are some things you’ve learned?